The weather was crazy for Day 1 of Lollapalooza!

 But fear not! We are down for anything. Need an excuse to “warm yourself up”? Need someone to talk to? Have a fantasy that you’d like us to share in? (Like doing something naughty while listening to Blink 182 live)? Give us a call! We’re here for YOU.


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(Psst. Want to hear about our naughty stories from our last Lollapalooza experience? Check out our other blog posts! (Lollapalooza Stories).



From the amount of phone calls that I received yesterday, it sounds like you really want to hear more about my adventures at Lollapalooza 2016.

Okay, as promised, I will share my second sexual experience also on day one, because the fun didn’t end there…

I had moved on from tent-maze city, and had joined a wave of audience goers bumping to the music of Danny Brown. I had gotten pretty deep into the audience, when I came upon a group of guys wanking off to the beat. They were in a tight circle, and any girl who’d catch their eye, they’d wink at. I don’t think they expected me to do more than just blush, and turn away.

Instead, I slowly B-lined over to their group, and asked out loud “if I could help?” Their eyes looked over my bubbly butt escaping the confines of my short-shorts, and up to my loosely fitted shirt barely containing my breasts. Two men stepped forward, grabbed my arms, and pulled me into their group. They tightly closed their circle around me. I felt several hands feeling up my inner thighs, hands grasping at my boobs, and a hand making its way down into my shorts. One by one, my garments came off. Several hands were grasping my bubbly bottom and outer vaginal lips. I let out a moan.

Two guys in front of me, guided me down, and I put both of their cocks in my mouth. With each hand, I held one man’s penis, and went back and forth on who I was sucking. Three other men in the group decided to join in on the fun, and I found myself sucking five dicks total. It was a very unique experience. Several of the other guys in the group, continued to jack off, while watching me suck their peers.

A few minutes into this epic circle jerk, two guys (who were watching me from behind) decided to get in on the action. I felt a group of hands pull me up and whip me around to face them. I look up, and these two men are built like linebackers. One guys says to me, “If you want to have a good time, then you need to have some real BBC”, and proceeds to whip out this massive python out of his pants. Just seeing his hard throbbing massive cock made my pussy get very wet. The second guy pulled out another amazing hard throbbing snake. I looked around at all of the guys, and told them that I was “an equal opportunist” and asked “what we were all waiting for?”

Let’s just say that the following moments were the most epic dong-deep throat fest that I’ve ever been in… I had multiple cocks inside me at all times. It was penis, cock, dong, willy, johnson– in EVERY DIRECTION. It was incredibly hot.

(So hot that it is making me really wet just thinking about this. I need someone to help me out. Someone call me.  1-800-SEX TALK .  The more I write, the more soaked my underwear is getting. I think that I am going to have to just take them off…)

The crazy part is that there were constantly new people joining in to our epic circle jerk, that I honestly lost count of how many body parts went into my mouth…

(This story is making me touch myself. I can’t type and touch… Mmm…) 1-800-SEX TALK

So if you were in Lollapalooza in the summer of 2016, and you were a part of a twisted mass of body parts, that would have been me. 😉

(Oh gosh, would someone just call me now, I am pulling out my vibrator. I need to hear your voice. I am getting so horny. Would someone just call me? Fuck. I am so wet. Fuck. I don’t know if I can finish this blog…)

I’ll…write…more…tomorrow…but I need someone to call me. *massaging my wet pussy in a circular motion*

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Day 2: Crashed a Circle Jerk

It’s August in Chicago!

Do you know what that means? It means that it is time to get laid while listening to the best live music available! Whoo-hoo! August 3rd is the first day of Lollapalooza, a music festival that is held in Chicago for the last 25 years. It’s also the sexiest of concerts that you’d ever go to, so I highly suggest getting your butt over there, and surveying the scene.

Why do I like it so much? Well, let me tell you about the Summer of 2016…

Wearing just my little booty shorts, and this flowing v-neck top, I hitchhiked my butt all of the way to Chicago for three days of bliss.

On the first day, I met a group of young man from a local college (Columbia, I think). They had taken several tents and tarp, and had made this epic maze of rooms. I asked one of the cute boys from the group to show me around, and he shyly agreed. I could tell he liked me, because he was watching me every time I moved. I even pretended to accidentally drop something on the floor, bent over with my boobs hanging low, and looked over to see him salivating with desire.

After walking me through the third room of his tent kingdom, he took me into his quarters, pulled me so close that I could feel his hard cock bulging in his pants. Using my hips, I pressed them rhythmically against his hard desire. His mind fully focused on his needs, he quickly removed his pants, to expose this massive BBC. I slowly and teasingly dropped my short-shorts to the floor. He stood in front of me, gripping his massive cock, and beckons me to come forward. Looking into his eyes, I take my fingers, and slowly remove my wet undies. He steps forward, picks me up by the waist, and slowly slides my vagina over his hard throbbing warm incredible cock. He lifts me up, and slides me down that incredible shaft. Again. And, again. My tight little wet pussy is being opened up by this great massive force. And, it feels sooooo good.

He then lays me down on my back on this neon red bean bag, and quickens the pace. His thrusts are harder, faster, and deeper. Every thrust, causes my large breasts to bounce up into my face. Still inside me, he cups my breasts with both hands, and massages them. His thumbs circle my hard erect nipples, and his thrusting becomes insane.

He is on the verge of coming, I could feel the blinding animalistic level of pleasure he is about to encounter. This shy young man a moment ago, is fucking my pussy like it’s the last activity that he is going to perform on Earth.

He takes his hands, and grabs me around the waist, and pulls me forward. His eyes are closed, and he is no longer able to control his primal urge. He gasps into my ear, “you’re… my… first”, before cuming, and drowning in the awesome world of orgasmic euphoria…

Day one was pretty awesome, I walked away with this young college kid’s V-card. But it didn’t end there. Like I said, this festival is known for the most folks getting down.

All of this writing is making me really, really, wet. Like I need someone to call me right now, and help me rub one off.

1-800-SEX TALK

 Please, someone, call me right now. My panties are so wet. Hey, if you call me, I promise that I will write down more of my sexy adventures in tomorrow’s blog…

Lollapalooza Day 1: V-Card Score!

Today’s fun comic is brought to you by The Oatmeal…




















These rules for Love Stink!

Just call us instead!

We’re not going to make you lie uncomfortably with a mouth full of hair. Instead, you tell us want you want, and we will gladly do it. Sit back, stiff in hand, and enjoy the ride. 😉

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You can cum on me anytime, baby!

These spoofs are awesome! If your penis could shoot ANYTHING out of it, what would it be? Tell us! We want to know! 

Plus, we might need you to describe what you would want a girl to do with all of that goodness. We are here to help you out with that. *wink*

So give us a call, and let us know how to be of service…


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It’s Sex Ed Wednesday: here’s to finding videos will educate you about the opposite sex.

You don’t have to be a gay man to understand “the fear of the vagina”.

Here’s a simple video that will help you along.

If you find yourself wanting to learn more–call our girls!

1-800-SEX TALK

We are here 24/7!

Give us a call!

What’s that? Put a grapefruit on his penis? Are you serious?

Dead serious.

Thanks to the new movie, Girls Trip, this little gem will be a staple in many bedrooms and porn flicks to come…

And guys, if you decide to try it out for yourself, give us a call. We want to be with you every step of the way!




Source: 01 02

Why Do We Kiss?

Ever wondered what the scientific reason was behind kissing? Or why one lover was an excellent kisser and you couldn’t wait to have your mouth around theirs, but another lover’s kiss made you gag? Well, at 1-800-SEX-TALK, we looked to the power of the internet, and found a scientific community dissecting these very questions…

What’s your favorite kind of make out session? Do you like it when other places are kissed? What turns you on the most?

Let us know!

1-800-SEX TALK